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Choose Wisely: It matters who you marry


On September 5th, 2009 we said I do. He was 21 and I was 20. Although, we were young my decision to marry this man was not a mistake and never will be. This year we will celebrate our 8th wedding anniversary! Woohoo!

It is so important to choose wisely whom you marry. Do it carefully and take your time because every marriage will face its challenges. Those challenges not only reveal who you are to you but to your spouse as well. You want a man whose going to love you out of your brokenness. Who will love you unconditionally, challenge you to grow, believe in you regardless of how many times you’ve failed and stand beside you through the toughest times. Most importantly you want a man who is gong to lead your family closer to God and instead of drawing farther away.

A good husband will love you "as Christ loved the church"(Ephesians 5:25) .

A good man will provide: Danny and I could have never imagined the many challenges we would have to face together. He has stood by me through illness and when I couldn't work he worked hard for the both of us. Whenever I was at the hospital he would stay there with me till I was discharged and sometimes on two hour sleep go into work after a long night at the hospital.  

A good man will let you grow: When I decided to go back to school, he would take about an hour train ride to be with me while I studied late on campus. He would quiz me with index cards so I could study for my tests. He would let me go over my presentations with him and would listen patiently. Thank you Danny, without you I would have never been able to achieve cum laude.

A good man won't trample your dreams: When I broke my laptop he bought me a new one, when I wanted to learn guitar he bought me one, when I wanted to re-stain our dining table, he bought me the sander and stain. When I decided to pick up photography he helped me get my first camera, when I thought it would be smart to make a headboard out of our coffee table lol he let me do it (even though it was ugly). 

A good man will love the attitude out of you: The person I was when we got married is not the person I am today! I went into marriage with a, "I don't need you mentality". You know, the I can take care of myself if you ever leave me, so don’t think your special mentality? Boy was I wrong! Danny, you are so special to me and I can't imagine my life without you. Although, it may be true I can live without you, everyday would be a nightmare. The countless time I would tear you down because I did not want to let my guard down. You loved me through it. Thank You. My heart is yours.

A good man will not let you grieve alone: 

When we lost our babies he didn't look at me in disappointment, he just loved on me. We grieved together and so we grew together. No matter how many times I cried, he would patiently hear me vent and hold me. He did not rush my healing process he just loved me through it. He was there when I delivered, he held our baby, he helped me shower and he wheeled me out of the hospital. He never left my side. 

These are the things I've learned from my husband. And I thank God for Him. If I had chosen otherwise, things could be different. Perhaps, when she prays would not exist today. Marriage takes work and I am grateful God has taught us how to put the right kind of work into it. 

Danny, I hope when you read this you are reminded of how much I love you. You are my knight in shinning armor that rescued me from myself. You've allowed me to grow and have stood by me every step of the way. You've celebrated every triumph with me. I can't wait when we have our children, so they can hear all our stories and how much Daddy and Mommy love each other. 

Love, 

Zuleika 

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