What was supposed to kill me only made me stronger. Jeremiah 29:11, For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord," God had plans for me and my life. When I say there is a blessing in the storm, believe me (to God be the Glory). Look at me telling my story. I am a survivor of domestic violence. I have been putting bandages after bandages to cover up this wound. Smiling on the outside, yet I was hurting so bad in the inside. I was so wrapped up in the fact of being in love, but little did I know clearly that was not love. I did not love myself nor did I value myself. I was so blinded by the fact that I wanted a family. The goal was not to be a single mother. The first time my ex blacked my eye and burst my lip I blamed myself and questioned why I was not good enough. Verbal abuse after verbal abuse, to living in a home with no communication involved. He showed more interest in his phone than he did in me. God sent me a wake up call the night he put a gun in my mouth and it didn’t go off. He began choking me until my vision went blurry. There I was begging him not to kill me in front of our daughter.
That night he went to sleep, I had thoughts of stabbing him multiple times and all the ways I could pay him back, but I didn't. For six years, I carried this pain, anger, depression, and bitterness. This year I finally came clean and told my parents everything. In November 2019 I began attending church again, but I was church hopping so I couldn’t receive conviction anywhere. Finally, God lead me to my church home and I became convicted when I entered. My pastor was preaching to my situation. I got up and went to the altar, I was tired of feeling the way that I was feeling. I realized I could not continue living my life the way I was living, I needed God in my life. It was the best decision I’ve ever made. In the beginning of August I rededicated my life to Christ. I now know who I am and I know that God did it. Thank God for healing and deliverance. I’m free!!!! I had to let my hurt and pain go because I know I had to forgive him. God had been sending many young ladiesmy way and my testimony has been an inspiration to them. God truly had a plan for me and my life.