"My son, give me your heart and let your eyes delight in my ways." (Proverbs 23:26)
The Lord graciously saved me at the age of 32. As a child growing up, I went through many challenges. I experienced much isolation and loneliness. I could not bring myself to believe that anyone could love me just as I was. This led me to frequent bouts with deep depression throughout my childhood and into my adult years.
I watched a ShePrayed sister moment and watching while having so many emotions going through me; God gave me the strength to sit there and watch. I was at a point in my life where I was feeling lost, confused, and betrayed as I was trying to heal from a broken heart. It was at the end of this prayer moment that my life changed. I remember watching as tears were coming down. They had a call for salvation. I knew it was God telling me," this is what I want you to do". Take this call, trust in me, and I did. I surrendered, and I put my trust in Him.
I remember as he wooed me, my heart fell further and further, and before I knew it, I was in love. I remember I was having a rough day, and this man kept speaking sweet nothings to me, letting me know everything was okay and that I could rest in His love. That is when I truly gave in and gave Him my heart. As soon as I opened the door to my bedroom, I melted into the floor. I found myself in a complete fetal position crying out for a much bigger love than you and me. And for the first time in my life, I knew I was enough, just the way I was. Love swept over me. It was unlike anything I have ever felt or dreamt. It was a hope that would stay with me for years to come, through highs and lows, through the ups and downs. I realized this love was here to stay. I had become so conditioned to people leaving. I had become so used to being told that I was not good enough. So something this raw, unfiltered, and captivating took me by surprise.
I find myself falling more and more in love with Jesus. My love for Him continues to progress, and I could not live a day without my Savior. He loves me unconditionally, even when I walked away. Even when I gave up, He continues to love me through all that. He loved me in my messiness, and for that, I am forever grateful. I now understand what it means that there was only one set of footprints in the sand. As I look back on my life, I see how He carried me. I see how He loved me, even when I couldn't love myself. When everyone else deemed me as unworthy, He treasured me.
Friends, it's a love I can't describe, and I so deeply want you to experience this love and joy I feel in my heart. I hope that you come to know God. I pray you come to know His love, grace, kindness, and mercy. It's a love that will carry you through the rest of your life. I can't explain it. I can't put together the words to convey how beautiful a relationship with Jesus can be. All I hope is that you experience the fullness of it too.
I desire that God uses what He's put in my heart to encourage the hearts of others, strengthen their faith, and point them to Jesus. Whatever He has called you to do, He knew just who He was getting when He put that dream and vision in your heart. He is thrilled when we come to Him and say, "God, I don't know what to do. I need your help." God isn't worried that we don't know what we're doing. He knows what HE'S doing. He has already promised to show us what to do. He says, "Call to me, and I will show you things that you could never figure out on your own." (Jeremiah 33:3) He promises to give us wisdom. James 1:5-6, MSG, says, "If you don't know what you're doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You'll get His help and won't be condescended when you ask for it. Ask boldly, believing without a second thought."
- Stephanie Reveron